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| Monday, April 28, 2008 |
| Gentle Giant |
Being a single mother for any amount of time will jade and embitter even the sweetest of women. A certain part of her heart has to become hard and inaccessible. She becomes accustomed to fighting the battles of her children, disciplining, playing, providing for, and comforting them on her own. So it is, when a man comes into her life wanting to play the father role to her children, who have none, a difficult thing for her to swallow.
Unless of course he is a gentle giant. He brings home little things for them that he crafts with his own hands. Something she can't help but admire. Bicycles, wooden trains, game boards, huge barrels.. always peppering his kindness for her sons with a flower or small token of love and appreciation for her. He never raises his voice to them, but teaches them small necessary life lessons with a kind tongue, never scolding or threatening.. but allowing them to choose to take his advice or leave it. Their punishment is the natural consequence of their decision.. but they respond so well, usually the natural consequence is a positive thing.
His mark on their life is so great that the hardened heart of the single mother has become pliable, soft and relenting. She has come to depend on his gentle fortitude, and is grateful for the help he provides. He helps her build a life of great wonder, where her children are more independent, learning to become men in a hard and cold world. He shows her how much simpler things can be when worked at as a team. He loves her with his whole heart, and she does the same. Until eventually, she can't remember what life was like with out her gentle giant. |
posted by katmandusuekookachoo @ 3:07 PM  |
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| Monday, April 21, 2008 |
| Ordinary Day |
I woke up this morning feeling blissful, so blissful I didn't want to get up. I stretched a good back-bending stretch that included everything from my fingertips to my toes. It was such a good stretch, I can not help but find myself reflecting on it through out this day, with a small appreciative smile. It was one of those sprawling stretches, that if viewed by anyone else, would end in the pair of you doubled over in a giggle that would no doubt include a few snorts and sighs.
I wander out of my room on a mission for coffee, pausing in the bathroom briefly. Along the way I glanced in on my little men, sleeping soundly in their respective beds. Dylan with his hand hanging down nearly to the floor, Jed lying straight with the blanket pulled to his neck, Ben curled in an impossible ball. I am struck with a feeling of deep gratitude..
In my head I wonder what I should wear, what I should make for dinner tonight, what I should do about my bills. I wash my face, sip my coffee, put on my makeup, get dressed, comb my long scraggly hair.. kiss my oldest two on their way out the door for school, make a lunch for the little guy, and find myself just sitting. Sitting on the edge of the bed feeling both happy and miserable all at once.
I miss my guy. I am alone and I hate it. But, I am also really happy. My life is for once in order.
So goes this ordinary day. One in a million Ordinary days. I go to work, push paper, order and pick up lunch, talk to my co-workers, and outline tomorrow's schedule. I talked to an old friend from high school. I smoked, ate lunch, drank a coke and sat feeling sort of useless. I conducted two interviews, turning one person away and inviting another to a secondary interview.
When I return to my house I know I am going to find that my children have cleaned the common areas and done their laundry. Tonight is date-night for us. We always do something on Mondays, if their chores are completed. I am going to cook dinner and we will talk about the accomplishments and enlightened moments in our days. The children will shower, we will pray together, and they will sleep. I will lie wide awake staring at the ceiling for three hours before I finally give up and read until rest finally comes.
And so ensues tomorrow.. which no doubt.. will be another Ordinary Day. |
| posted by katmandusuekookachoo @ 4:15 PM |
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