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| Thursday, October 05, 2006 |
| Thursday |
Okay, so tonight I have a date. . with my husband and his fantasy, one of my friends. She has great big fake boobs, flawless skin, and size four hips. Needless to say, for me, its a love hate relationship. My hubby would NEVER admit his attraction to her.. but its obvious. The man scrambles.. I mean, SCRAMBLES to assist her with the slightest menial thing. As do most men we know. She is the kind of girl that could pose for playboy. At any stage of her life.. pregnancy, post pregnancy, pre pregnancy... blah! And for that I am jealous, and for that I am petty and mean. She asks if I'm going to a show, sure, I tell her... 'would you get me a ticket?' Sure I say... 'but, I expect you to pay for the ticket, the service charge and my gas to and from the ticket booth.' I am such a bitch.
I know what she will be wearing to the show. Its always the same... black halter top khaki postage stamp sized skirt and knee high boots. No bra, no panties. Then she will go out to the mosh pit after guzzling two pitchers of beer and two shots of jaeger. She will be mauled, she will nearly lose her clothing, then she will come back wet with sweat from head to toe, invigorated and shining. I will have to stand and listen to her hillarious tales of strange men and women fondling her, as I watch my husband drool out the side of his mouth. Sexy.
If it weren't for the fact that my hubby really isn't a punker, I would just go to the show with him, but he doesnt understand the rules of the game, and he becomes.. like an eight year old. My girlfriend keeps his maturity level in check. So, I guess in a way, she is my secret weapon, as sad as it is to admit. I'd hit the show alone.. but, he would NEVER allow that. Her stories make him not trust her, so he isn't about to let me go only with her. Its a catch twenty two. I think I will just get incredibly piss drunk, then I wont really give a shit. For two days I have obsessed about what to wear. I am almost to the stage of pajama bottoms and a huge tee shirt. My husband asserts that not trying to be sexy is sexy...
So, I'm settling with a sheer white button shirt under a blue halter top, jeans, cordouroy page boy hat and pig tails. I will smoke out my eye makeup and wear nude lipstick. I will smile at everyone and enjoy the show. I will. If it kills me, I will.
They are my favorite punk band dammit!!! |
posted by katmandusuekookachoo @ 12:27 PM  |
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